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This is the 20th year teaching in the Los Angeles Unified School District for Henry Anker. Over the years he has developed a number of flash-based tests for kids, grades one through six based on the State’s Standard Test. He’s currently serving as an ITAF More »
As parents we love to praise our kids. A good grade they got on a paper, a touch-down they got or cleaning up their room without being told – these are all fair examples. We feel this is the proper positive reinforcement they need to grow into healthy, well-balanced adults, right? Based on the results of over thirty years of scientific study is revealing More »
New moms and dads are quick to learn about the shortage of space in quality preschools and daycares throughout Los Angeles. We quickly give in to the lengthy waiting lists, the secret handshakes, the endless tours and the skyrocketing application fees. Before you send in that application fee wouldn’t you like to get honest feedback from parents who have children that either attend the school or have attended there?
You may be in luck, there is a website, The Savvy Source, that allows parents to anonymously rate and comment on preschools and daycares throughout the country. The Savvy Source is similar to the Great Schools website, which also has a wealth of information and resources for parents of preschool children as well as school-aged children but does not have preschool or daycare parent reviews.
Like any User driven review site, the Savvy Source is only as good as the User makes it. Meaning, if there isn’t a review for your neighborhood school your kid goes to, take a minute and do one. If the school isn’t even listed, leave a note for the school’s Director to fill one out.
Reviews include categories like “Quality of Teaching,” “Home, School Connection,” and “Discipline, Health, and Safety” to name a few. Each section is described by the School’s Director and is parent rated (simple 5 star rating system) and includes confidential parent comments, criticism and insight. The sum of these reviews will allow incoming parents to have a snapshot of what the school is like.
Sited Links:
The Savvy Source | Preschools & Daycares in California
Great Schools
There is a plethora of information and recent studies supporting the positive impact of an active father figure. I will point out that “father figure” can be a dad, an uncle, a grandfather, a family friend or guardian who has a major influence on a child’s life.
A major impact on developing boys and girls, arguably more than what you say is what you do and how you do it. It happens to every parent at some point, your kid does or says something exactly the way you do it. They are using mimicry or modeling to develop social cues and understand this complex world that they’re in. Yes, they’re watching you and taking notes, they look to us to see how we deal with things, how we express ourselves and how we show (or not show) our emotions.
I’m not saying that these activities are explicitly about modeling, but I want to frame this list with the idea of how your kids pay attention to you and your actions and maybe plant a seed about how dads can have fun with their kids, get to know them and potentially have a positive impact on their development.
1. Learn to Cook with them.
If you have never cooked in the kitchen, you are the best candidate for this activity. You can use this as an opportunity to show your kids how to learn, how to take on challenges, how to take yourself lightly. And if you do know you way around the food processor, pick up a new recipe but keep it simple. Understand, in their eyes you are The Man with all the answers, showing that you don’t know anything – is a good thing. I am willing to bet, you will see them bond with you quickly as you both try and figure things out. Just think of the fond memories they will have “that time Dad and I tried to make pancakes!”
2. Play Sports or Activity with them.
Much like the cooking lesson scenario, try choosing something you have never done. Be playful about it and play on their terms. Most of their life is spent wading through lots of rules, rules at school, mom and dad’s rules, etc. Guide them with love and affection and let them call the shots within the framework of the sport or activity, and listen to what they’re saying. This is really an opportunity to shower them with your attention. Choose something age appropriate and something that does not necessarily give you a natural advantage and with young kids – the sillier the better! See who can hop the longest, this kind of thing. And lastly, whatever the sport is – suck at it! Let them win! Show them how to lose properly, not to take it too seriously and to have a sense of humor.
3. Learn a Hobby Together.
Maybe you’ve always wanted to learn chess, or how to play the guitar, or maybe find time to plant that herb garden, there are a ton of things that you can do, but make sure you choose something that your child is enthusiastic about. Remember, it’s not about spending money on the kid, it is about spending time. If you have multiple kids, I suggest choosing different hobbies for each kid. Again, this is their hobby, something that you can both plan on and look forward to doing.
4. Include Them in the Things You Love.
Chances are if you are a jogger, your son or daughter may express some type of curiosity/interest in it at some point, if they’re young enough – through them in a jogging stroller (don’t have one, find a neighbor with one and take it for a test ride). Maybe you like to work on the house, car, motorcycle or even garden on the weekends. Make them your helper. I got my oldest son (he’s 4 yrs.) a tool belt and toolbox filled with toy tools, he “helps” me on the weekend whenever I have a “project”. He takes it very seriously, and I love him for it.
5. Take a Trip Together.
This sounds like a big ticket item, but it doesn’t have to be. When I was a kid, I used to go grocery shopping (I was in charge of the coupons) with my mother and afterward we would go someplace for dinner, good memories. Younger kids are easy in this department, taking them to a car wash can be a super adventure. It can also be as simple as including them in one of your weekly rituals – maybe it is that weekly trip to get those good bagels on Saturday morning (maybe the best part of the trip is letting them place the order when you finally get to the front of the line). One of my favorite things to do with the kids is stop at the grocery store and by a cheap loaf of bread and either go to the park and feed the ducks or go to the beach and feed the birds. No need to mention the look on their face when they go to their first ball game and stuff their face with hot dogs and ice cream bars.
Whatever you do, remember you are helping to build positive memories with them. Take a backwards approach, and think of how you would want to remember these moments (“dad would always let me eat the first hot bagel on the way home”) and most importantly have fun with them.
Related Links:
Suite 101 | Activities to Help Preschoolers Bond With Dad
Family Corner | Importance of the Father/Child Bond
Texas A&M University | 20 Reasons Why Your Child Needs You to Be an Active Father
It isn’t always clear, that’s for sure. Toys have hidden dangers by design, meaning some items just aren’t designed well or safe. And there are other dangers due to what the they are made of – like phthalates, which is a chemical used to bind fragrance in a number of infant and children hygiene products and it is also used to make plastic soft and pliable (think of a rubber duckie). There are also the indirect dangers of certain toys due to unsupervised and/or improper use of a given toy.
That’s a lot to think about when you’re out and about buying something for your kid or niece or grand kid. One of the best things you can do when shopping for a child (especially when it is not your own) is;
1. Buy toys that are age appropriate,
2. Be considerate if you are buying toys for a family with young children. Think about everyone who might play with a toy. Something that is perfectly safe for an older child could be deadly for a younger one. This doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t buy that fun toy with small parts for your ten-year-old if you have a toddler in the house — or one who visits a lot. But it does mean that you need to have rules about where the toy is stored and who plays with it.
3. And when in doubt (whenever possible), check with the parents before making a purchase or of course get them a good book.
In general, when you are buying toys, use common sense. That toy sword may not be sharp, but if your daughter is going through a phase where she’s hitting everything and everyone around her, is it smart to buy it? Is there a safe place in your house or yard to play with that really cool flying toy your son wants?
Here is a general grouping of hazards as monitored by the Consumer Products Safety Commission’s (CPSC);
This covers the main issues covered by the CPSC but it does not include the issue of known toxins in toys (ex. phthalates) that aren’t tracked by the government, and cheap or poor design or construction. I will say it again, use your common sense;
Sited and Related Links:
CPSC Deliver’s ABC’s of Toy Safety
Gather | How to choose the best, safest toys…
Sure deep down we like to think we Dads have MacGyver potential but honestly, we fall flat most of the time. Think about it, to really pull it off you would have to have a sundry of supplies tucked away in every nook and cranny of your person.
Some Dads may already be on top of this, occasionally I have a moment of brilliance but most of the time it is pure luck. What is he talking about? I’m talking about having stuff on hand to entertain the kids on the drop of a dime.
Say, you grab one of the tikes to tag along with you while you make that visit to the post office only to find there’s only one window open and the line that bending around the corner conjures images of everlasting purgatory and your kid looks up at you and says with tender innocence, “Dad, this is going to take a long long time. Do we really have to mail these?” And most of the time (unfortunately), the answer is yes.
Well, the folks at Wire + Twine have a little sack of fun that may ease the pain for the little ones. What’s in it?
If you are cheap or just inspired, you could easily fashion you own kit. Regardless, consider getting one for the wife or perhaps a friend or family member, a portion of the proceeds go to Heifer International.
$25 [+shipping] at Wire + Twine
Tags: better dad, better living, dad hack, design
